my heart; still in Greece.

i left my heart in Greece.

and i know that may sound dramatic, but i honestly feel like my heart is still in Greece.

is this normal? 

when i went to Mexico on a missions trip, i didn't leave my heart there. i left a teeny piece of it with my "3 crazy monkeys", (Karla, Yaneth, and Emily), but i don't think i left my whole heart there.

i fell in love with Greece and her people. i miss the sunsets, the generosity shown by Greeks, the gelato and gyros (haha), and yes...i even miss the public transportation and the 98* weather every day! i would even go back in August 2013, just to be back in Greece (and i said i never wanted to go back to Greece in August, it was too hot).

when i said that Thessaloniki became my home, i really mean that it became my home.
i miss it so much!
i would seriously hop on the next plane to Thessaloniki if i had the money.

ahh, i know God has called me to be home in Maryland for this season...
but my heart wants to be home.
i want to be in Greece.
this is so hard.
i didn't know i would miss Greece this much.

i didn't even WANT to go to Greece at first, but now i can't stop thinking about going back!

my Thessaloniki home, i'll be back for my heart someday soon.

sunset at the White Tower, looking towards the port.
Thessaloniki, Greece. <3

where do i belong?

home felt like a vague memory. something that was years ago. i had been "ripped out" of my home in Maryland and "planted" in YWAM Kona for three months.
ripped out of the "YWAM bubble" and planted in Thessaloniki, Greece for three months. then i was ripped out of Greece (where i fell in love with the people) and re-planted in Kona.
then ripped out of the YWAM environment and transported back "home" to Maryland.

it had me questioning if i even knew what home was. where did i really belong? in worship, we sang the song "where i belong", but even though i knew i belonged in the Lord's presence, i didn't feel like it mattered. there were times when i would cry my eyes out before the Lord because i didn't feel like i belonged anywhere. people told me that everywhere was home because the Lord was there, but i still struggled.

what is home? where do i belong? 

on outreach, a friend gave me a note that said, "i saw the word "sweet" then a picture of "homes" so maybe you'll find where you belong & feel at home soon."  

and she wrote Psalm 27 on the note, which says in verse 4, "one thing i ask of the Lord, this is what i seek: that i may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek Him in His temple."

and in verses 7-8, "Hear my voice when i call, O Lord; be merciful to me and answer me. my heart says of You, "seek His face!" Your face, Lord, i will seek."

so even though i am back in Maryland, missing Greece terribly, and don't know exactly where i belong, i will seek the Lord's face. i will gaze upon His beauty and it will be more than enough for my soul.